Afternoon:

Ryan is out of town all week.  I’m alone.  Tucker is depressed.  And we’re watching Ren and Stimpy.  I’ve put my hosting site search on hold for now because I am lazy today.  I’m also nervous that people won’t click on the ads and I’ll lose money on this whole endeavor. All I want to do is blog.  That’s been my dream for years now.  But it’s so close now and I’m nervous.
I don’t have a huge following, I need to work on that.  I need to do a little guerilla advertising.  Get the name rhaimi out into the Interspace.  Tag more relatable words and just breathe.  It’ll happen.
Although I may not seem like much, I’m here to help people with anxiety, listen to people’s stories and learn from them.  Rhaimi was always meant to be an open space for ideas and opinions.  For others to come and realize, their lives are not much different.  As I am the epitome of “normal twenty-something girl…”  Well…As normal as one can get…I wanted to be like a big sister to young girls who needed direction, advice, someone to talk to about growing up.
I wanted rhaimi to be a place for friends.  Something people talk about and laugh at.  Because my life is like a joke.  A relatable and tender hearted joke.  Those times with baby poop.  Or a dog that curls into such a tight ball his nose is totally up his butt as he farts right in his own face.  A boyfriend that sings made up songs for me and plays video games so I can watch.  No desire for a corporate job.  Money was never anything I had, nothing I ever thought of unless it was to pay bills and spoil others.  Buy some cute clothes and food.  That’s it.
I used to think I was broken because my ambitions and dreams didn’t revolve around money and a career, but family and writing.   And here I am, writing.  With a family…well…a boyfriend and his farting dog…but..you get it…
Adding Google Adsense would only make my blog that much more relatable.  Ads for Target or Urban Outfitters, Starbucks and pet stores.  It may turn out a small profit.  Right?  And once I gain a following the only logical thing is I’d get more money.  Right?  Am I crazy for doing this?  Writing about my life and hoping it helps others, hoping I make a few bucks telling people it’s okay to be nervous or scared?  Laughing with people at my job hunting antics and personal lack of grace…It’s okay.
Just tell me I’m not crazy.  Because I’m standing at the edge of something big, I think.  And I don’t want to fall into an abyss for nothing.   Tell me I’ll jump and you guys will be there with me as I land on solid ground.  On a dream made real.

I'm 26. Lost and in transition. I don't have the answers, just thoughts.