Ad Sense makes sense.  Until I realized I had to cancel an old application and start fresh with a new one after that one is officially closed……So people can click on my ads and I can make money doing the thing I love most, blogging.  There’s a quote in a movie that says, “Blogging is just graffiti with punctuation.”  I like that.
I’m a subversive cyber graffiti artist.  HAHA.

9 days.

Also, I want to learn to become a mortician.  Seriously.  I have a hard time with people, with anxiety and my social awkwardness, most of my life is on the Internet, I am not afraid of death in even the most grim of circumstances, and I would probably work better with grieving people and dead people.  I can help immensely.  I can console, comfort, and hug.  And then go make ready the person that has passed on with care and meticulous preparation.  Perfection in embalming.  I really want to try.  It makes sense that this is where my brain goes, honestly.  Ever since I saw My Girl when I was ten and Jamie Lee Curtis was doing the makeup on a recently deceased grandmother. I wanted to do that.  Death is always a booming business no matter the economy, and I would honestly be helping a lot of people through a very difficult time with all the grace I can muster.  I want to do this more than becoming a mechanic, more than being in corporate America.  I want to learn more about it first, so I can make a good decision for my future.  I can work anywhere.  And the money would help Ryan and I out a lot.
I want to help people more than anything, through blogging and sharing my story.  Through loving Ryan more than anything else and being there for him, starting in just 9 days.  And I want to help the most vulnerable people-those that just recently lost loved ones.  And those that have passed.  I want to give myself to helping others.  It makes sense.  I may not do well in social situations, but inside, through the anxiety, all I want to do is help.

I'm 26. Lost and in transition. I don't have the answers, just thoughts.